The Practice of Calming

The practice of “calming” is another part of B training that I find particularly interesting—and also a probably healthy skill, one that has already on 4 occasions now actually helped me on my job.

If you asked anyone in my family who is the biggest hothead, I’m sure that I would be the top vote getter. For that reason, I’ve always admired calm and analytical people, people like airline pilots. Also for that very reason, at my job and also with those who really don’t know me very well, I have tried to present myself as a calm problem solver. In fact, over the years, I’ve had people at my job and outside of my family tell me that I actually have a reputation as a peacemaker. I had one who jokingly asked me if “I had a pulse” because I didn’t react strongly to conflicts. Little did they know that inside, my pulse was flying. In reality, I am making great efforts to act out the part of being calm even as I get angry.

At any rate, I’ve tried to work on the calming thing as often as it occurs to me. I try to shift wherever I am into the slow drifting visualization combined with with the breaths. I also am helped by one other piece that the instructor pointed out: slight pauses at either end of the breath. A couple of time—four now—it has been useful on my job. I am in a lot of heated meetings. And as people start to get loud and emotional, my natural inclination is to respond in kind. So as they get emotional, even if I am forcing myself to remain quiet as I listen, I feel my own heart rate go up. On these occasions, I have reminded myself that this meeting right now is an opportunity to practice the breathing and calming thing. On four occasions, now I have been able to do this. The thought of it being a chance to practice calming has actually diverted me and taken me out of the motional rise of the meeting. In two of the four instances, my ability to be more analytical has been noticeably improved. I believe that the technique contributed to getting things resolved.

Notes on the First Months of Baguazhang Training

Looking back over the past few months, I wanted to note some impressions I had of B training and how I have reacted.

On the first night, the instructor spent much of the time looking at our gait, and other body positioning type things, and in me it was my feet pointing outward and also a skating motion to my walk.

The most useful to me was visualizing that we are being pulled by our belt buckle. This idea immediately pulled my hips in, and there was a definite noticeable difference with the walk. I felt taller and other subtle bits, that I could not pin down but definitely a feeling of being taller. I found myself each morning, night--especially when I was walking the dog in the dark practicing.

We had a lot of snow in February and March. As I walked the dog--who I noticed moves straight and with great ease, usually following his nose-- I made a real effort to walk with the leading belt and correcting the toes. On the way out for the walk, I was very deliberate. On the way back, I continued, but took note of my footprints in the snow and where they were aligned.

Here's the most memorable thing from the first session though, and the one that really peaked my interest. He had all of us stand next a post in the center of the room and push against the post. Of course as pushing made my body tilt backward, as I was pushing horizontally. Next he had us push the pole a second time, but this time upward at a 5% angle. While very slight, it made all the difference, as the force of pushing kept aligned with the feet on the ground and there was no rocking backward.

This tiny detail clicked with me. When I first started teaching--about my first 10 years--I was a middle school and then a high school wrestling coach. I had wrestled when I was a kid, and through high school, and then I continued to wrestle AAU freestyle, as a hobby of sorts while in college. When I first started wrestling, I lost all of my matches--maybe for the first two years. Then we worked under a coach who really understood the sport, and he pointed out tiny details to us in practice--often things like a slight adjustment of the hips or perhaps in controlling an arm or a shoulder, a slight adjustment . But this small positioning things made all of the difference, in the physics in the leverage or in the body's center of gravity. Anyway, the bottom line was these details--with practice-- made the moves work in a match. And all of a sudden, we stated winning matches.

Similarly, with my high school wrestlers , at some point, with corrections of important details and with practice, they would suddenly put it together and be able to execute moves in a match and score points. And, just an aside, this was always one of the joys I remember about coaching, seeing something click, seeing them change, progress and be so please with themselves. I recall one in particular. This kid was my 98 pounder for all of his years of high school. He actually had some growth problem that he stayed so small. His doctor was talking about growth hormones for him. But even as a senior, he'd weigh in with his boats and coat on an still never move the scale. Anyway, he was one that one day it clicked. And when he was a senior I recall he won 11 matches. Now he also lost 11 matches. But it was a real joy to see him find a measure of success. That was a lot of years ago. Just an aside: The last time I saw him, he was a paratrooper who was training people to jump, and ripped with muscles. Not real tall, but very macho. I remember telling him that I wished that 98 pounder who never weighed 98, could have seen just a glimpse of his future.

So for these reasons, this small detail of 5% made a lot of sense, and made me believe that there was something to learn here.

Chingachgook